The German Embassy Christmas Bazaar

The line at 9:30am

We woke up at o dark thirty this morning which these days is pretty easy to do considering thesun doesn't   rise until 9am. I joke not.  Our plans included for the day going to the German Embassy for the Christmas Bazaar and Metropolis for some last minute Thanksgiving food prep items.  It all started off great! The Mr ordered a taxi to take us to the other side of town.  Every embassy in this city is located IN THE CITY, imagine that, except for the German.  They were put outside of nowhere, over the river and thru the woods.  The Munchkins woke up fairly well considering it was a Saturday, a non school day and they wanted to sleep.  "Another Christmas Bazaar?" they yelled.  

You will go and you will like it, I said. It isn't like the last time.

Side bar....last time we went to the Italian Embassy for the Christmas Bazaar. Apparently, we just missed the line because we were able to walk right in. Bingo! Couldn't have planned it better if I tried. Until we got in and the Munchkins were smashed against the wall, down the stairs and in a tiny hallway for the coat check. Then we had to make our way back up the stairs (thank God we are Munchkins!) and into the Embassy we walked were we proceeded to be in the middle of of a mosh pit of foreigners looking for every bit and piece they could get their hands on. Diamond Lady scooped up Munchkin Two and walked around as if she were hers. We made a quick purchase to prove we were there and had a nice Italian liquid lunch (keeping in theme-we had food too!) to follow with our friends in a restaurant we had to ourselves. For future reference....I am glad I went, but won't do that again.

You will like it! It's the German Bazaar! They have neat Christmas stuff I say.  We arrive at 9:30 am to stand in line. We were told to get there early as people stand in line for this thing. We stood for a half hour in the freezing cold where we listened to the Munchkins complain and whine about the cold.  I bundled them up with what clothing we had left, scarves. Then proceeded to tell them what every parent says....stop whining, quit complaining, you whining about the cold isn't going to make it go away.  We are all cold!  Your stomach hurts? I can't do anything about that now. Why didn't you tell me before we left? Right...it didn't hurt then.  Potty? I don't have a potty.  Your stomach really hurts?  Well, I don't know what to say. I turn to the Mr and say you need to be prepared for two things....1) to get a taxi to leave if we need to and 2) there is a stomach virus going around school.

Guards started collecting passports.  After the line started moving we realized this must be a random thing?  In we walk thru security and pay our 150 rubles per adult.  We walk into the embassy and take our coats off, hang them up ourselves...self service here.  The Mr takes Munchkin One to the restroom. I start walking around with the other.  It's a large room with the perimeter lined with tables selling redecorated gingerbread houses, gifts bags, stollen, some beverage people were buying in cases(!), ornaments and lets not forget the jolly ole man himself.  The Mr returns with Munchkin One and we look at some ornaments. I thought it would be nice if they each chose one. These ornaments were going like hot cakes! They must be good I thought! So, I pointed to the ones we liked and the girl told me how much one of them was.  750 rubles for a tiny angel the size of my pinky I kid you not.  I walked away pretending I didn't see Munchkin two pick one up and accidentally break one.  Yes I did....Mother of the Year award right there!  

I turn to walk away from the ornaments and notice the Mr is gone. I look up and he is grabbing Munchkin One and running.  The Munchkin got sick ALL over the floor! I mean spilled anything that was in this child. And it continued out of the room, into the Embassy lobby, down the steps and into the restroom. I tell you there was nothing left in this child. Well, I did what any self respecting
Mother would do in my situation.  I pretended I didn't see a thing! And I pretended I didn't know the child.  Oh yes I did!  I turned and kept shopping. The Munchkin I had with me was none the wiser, never saw a thing.  I walked around the room like everyone else, not paying attention.  Dont you judge me! you would have done the same thing! Be glad i did....I am a sympathy puker and we would have had twice the mess.  turn and walk away i did. So, we went and had our picture taken with the jolly ole man except he wasn't jolly and seemed a bit anorexic. 

The Mr finally caught up with us in another room. He was composed and asked the plan. I suggested he take Munchkin One outside should he, Lord help us, puke again and call a taxi.  I told him I would meet him outside in a few because this bazaar was bizarre! It was horrible and not worth going to...and not because my kid got sick, although that didn't help.  I bought three ornaments to make our excursion there worth while. Munchkin Two and I went upstairs, put our coats on and went outside where I see the Mr has given Munchkin One popcorn to eat! In his defense it was free and a lady gave it to Munchkin One. I told Munchkin One he could not have it and then he cried.  Mother of the Year again, right? Taking popcorn from a child...what was I thinking?!

The taxi arrives soon after. The Mr, in his very good Russian, tells the driver my son, then rubs tummy, and holds a puke bag to his mouth.  The driver understood. See! It always comes bag to charades....do we really need to learn the language? All we do is point, make funny noises and say DA when they get it. Charades....it's the universal language I am tellin ya.

We make it home without incident. And Munchkin One has been fine all day! So far....but if he wakes up, I am pretending I am asleep and I don't know the kid!

(PS- don't waste your time going to the German bazaar. You can get everything in stores you would buy there...except for my families entertainment. And that's worth the cost of admission, right?)