Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Officials Step Up Stance Against U.S. Adoptions

This article appeared in The Moscow Times on Tuesday, October 23, 2012

I have so much to say about this article. It is adoption that is my passion. My heart belongs to the orphans. It is the Russian government that really lights a fire under my rear and gets me so upset. Who do these people think they are?!

Lets take this article apart paragraph by paragraph, shall we?

The U.S. mother from Tennessee who sent her child back to Russia in 2010 was and is an absolute disgrace. She was not and is not a fit mother. And let's not call her a mother. She is anything but a mother! The woman needs to sit in a jail cell the rest of her life. Because of her actions, not only has the life of a precious little boy suffered, but so many more who sit in orphanages across this country waiting for their forever family. They continue to wait even longer because of her actions.

What I found most hysterical is the U.S. State Department states this new agreement, enforced on November 1, will "promote a safe, ethical and transparent adoption process." Oh really? There is nothing ethical and transparent about this process at all. And I certainly don't expect an agreement to clarify it for me. Russia is anything but ethical! I have lived here for 3 months and I can see it. What is ethical about playing high roller with the life of a child...she will go to the highest bidder. Really? Right! This agreement will stop that? Um, no, it just happens deeper in a hallway than before. Transparent? I want to know where my money goes. I want to know why it is so damn expensive to adopt. I can tell you my money was not reinvested in the children.

The senior Foreign Ministry official is concerned about the fate of the children sent to the United States. What about the fate of the children in your own country? The 700,000 orphans? Where is hour outrage at what goes on in your own country? I understand the concern for the 19 children adopted by Americans whose lives have forever been changed due to abuse, neglect or death. I get it...I really do! But we are talking less than one percent. I am connected with many families who have adopted from Russia (as well as other countries). Each child is happy and well adjusted! They are unbelievable children! I use my own munchkin as an example. He is a blessing beyond measure! I can not imagine my life without him. The children in orphanages are blessings as well.

The Deputy Foreign Minister complains Russia gets no help from the U.S. and they are not informed of child abuse cases." Guess what? Neither are Americans! Child abuse cases in America are handled
with the strictest of care. It is meant to protect to child from further harm. Names are kept secret to protect the identity of the child (allowing them privacy). The child is the priority. I am not saying the U.S. is perfect. Please don't misunderstand my words. But Russia will not get help because Russia is not the focus. The child is. And furthermore, why would the U.S. make Russia aware of any child abuse case that occur with regards to American citizens? Last I recall, when in a Russian court room, the Mr and I were told Munchkin One was ours. He had all the rights of a biological child born to us and he was our responsibility now. They said, in a nice way, they didn't want him back.

Patel Astakhov states those who spread the "myths about how good it is for the children in America, what a great future they have, are either involved in the business or people without a clear conscience." I beg to differ greatly sir. The future is so good in Russia? Have you walked your streets? There is an old lady or amputee at eery corner. An old man has a heart attack, uirinates himself and his left for dead in a metro carriage car for a day. No one goes near him to see if he is ok. In fact, people walk into the carriage and walk out due to the odor. What about the dead man who just threw himself in front of the metro and is pulled up from underground, left on grass with not so much as a sheet over the body, allowing young babies and children to see the carnage? Nice future, huh? Have you looked at your numbers? Statistics show the number of orphans who have aged out of the system and enter society greatly turn to drugs, prostitution or commit suicide.

And let's turn our eyes to Tula where a Russian citizen convicted of rape, murder and burglary adopted five children. How in the hell does that happen? Oh paid him per child. you paid him during one of your was an incentive to adopt. Many Russian families took part in this because they wanted the money (not the child) because the future is so bright here, isnt it? and how are those children doing now? you know, the ones who were adopted for the money? have you followed up on any of them? A bit hypocritical don't you think? Americans have a saying "people in glass houses should not throw stones." And here is another "that's the pot calling the kettle black." Both mean the same...take care of your home first before you start criticizing and judging others.

Neither country is perfect. Neither system is perfect. But I want to know....who is speaking for the children? Where is their voice? All I hear are a bunch of adult bureaucrats creating more rules and obstacles.

If you heard the voice of a child you would hear them say "I just want to be loved."

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